In The Garden

No, relationships never, ever begin at maturity. This is a mistake that I have fallen into time and again, presuming that we, the both of us, begin at altitude instead of at ground level.

Example: Two adults meet, fall in click, figure they can make it work, and attempt to do so. The assumption of both parties is that the other is working from a framework of similar snapshots, that the beginning is clear.

What we actually have is two individuals with backgrounds, peers, modeling, assumptions, understandings, biases, visions and expectations that are at best hidden, and at worst unacknowledged.

So the beginning is clear on one level, the attraction part. But what of the rest? It’s akin to planting two flowers side-by-side thinking they’ll thrive in the same soil. One, however, is a rose, the other is a cactus; how to mesh those two?

Sure, they both have spiky bits, which might or might not be a similarity worth pursuing. But is the commonality worthy of ignoring the differences? Should Miss Piggy really be dating Kermit?

Two muppets is a lighthearted and worthwhile locus. If we humble ourselves, agree to start afresh, resonate to the discovery, things might turn out differently.

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