We spend enormous amounts of time sorting through the emotions of relationships. Endless loops of
What do I feel?
What does she feel?
What does this mean?
Why did she do this?
Is this important?
Does she like me?
How will she react to this?
Yet we ignore so much of what happens after our feelings are…well, as organized as feelings ever can be. Practical stuff makes up big gobs of our lives and contains traps for every relationship, but we often overlook them and their impact.
Money and how we handle it is one such under-examined element. How many couples fall apart over poorly managed finances, both as a unit and individually?
My answer is to start questioning this part of your dates’ lives much sooner in the dating process than we do currently, and to that end I think there’s one question to ask:
Do you have a budget?
Someone who has a written budget and at least attempts to follow it automatically falls into the top 5% of candidates. Living within one’s means is a foundation for reducing stress, in itself a head start to a better relationship.