This Is Different

Dating is different from pretty much everything else we do.

As a consumer, we’re used to having it our way. (Note the marketing guff.) We choose from an infinite variety of goods which will arrive at our front door within two days. If something fails to satisfy us completely, we send it straight back. Because that’s costly, the people providing us with that stuff have an interest in making precisely what we want, so we’re happy every time we buy. As time passes, we not only receive everything we want, we expect that to continue.

That’s not dating. There is no-one out there honing people production, aiming to satisfy all of our wishes. Finding someone is a strictly analog business, an off-the-shelf enterprise in which we scour various stores, outlets and vendors for just the right item. Sometimes we even take a peak in the bargain bin.

Choosing the right store is a start. Walking into Needless Markup determines what you’re likely to buy and how much you’ll pay. Idling through the clearance items at WalMart will find you contemplating a different kind of item. That only highlights our ability to choose the general area of our search, but that’s about it.

Once we accept that dating requires some legwork, some effort, some time and a lot of rejecting shoddy goods, it can be fun. Overcoming the fear of failure means not purchasing almost everything that’s on offer, and waiting for that one undervalued, perfectly fitting item to come along that exceeds our expectation and keeps delighting us.

Good luck.