Field of Embarrassment

My dating history is an embarrassment of riches in the gaffe dept. A selection:

There was the time I repeatedly called a date by the wrong name. For two hours. (That didn’t last.)

I ran a bath in one girlfriend’s apartment one night that I forgot to turn off. Her place and the one below flooded.

A (as it turned out) highly-paid lawyer got the benefit of my Dummies-informed legal mind on a first date. She had sympathy for a while, but the damage was done.

And there was the unforgettable triumph of me ordering foie gras  – for the first time mind – to find that I couldn’t stomach it. So much for sophistication. She laughed out loud at me.

The lessons are clear: order food you know and like, watch a running tub, write down and practice saying your date’s name, and for heaven’s sake, be yourself.

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