Hold ’em or Fold ’em.

Liv Boeree


Dating shares at least a couple of characteristics with poker.

Dating and poker both work best when you fine-tune your observational skills.

Dating and poker work more efficiently when you accurately assess what we know (our cards) and what we can only guess (her cards.)

And dating and poker have elements of randomness that will catch you by surprise. Sometimes it will be a good surprise, and at other times it will not.

In a game of high stakes, males constantly re-balance the likely outcome of any particular ambit: We re-calculate the risk versus the reward in real time. Viz:

+ If I tell a slightly risque joke, will that work in my favour?

+ If I create a little vacuum here by looking across the room, will she work to regain my attention?

+ If I put my hand on her knee, what is she most likely to do?

Smart daters and long-lived poker players also share the survival instinct. You can’t play if you don’t have chips. So if in doubt, fold, and fold early. That keeps you in the game while you wait for the deck to work in your favour.