Sex Sells

Seeking Approval

…or so the aphorism goes. The advertising business loves nothing more than shorthand ways to get to your credit card.

Want to emulate sports stars? Here’s what you wear.

Need to feel powerful? Sit in first class.

Squirrely in the trouser? Watch this girl ogle your car while she dreams of oral.

Sex isn’t what sells; what sells is approval. When a man buys a car, he isn’t actually thinking of the sex. Sure, in the cloud computer of his brain it’s there somewhere. But the tangible reaction he wants to that shiny new BMW is more subtle, along the lines of…

…wow, nice car.

…gee, I like this color.

…great, the mirror on this side shows all my zits. God, where did they come from?

At which point he will inevitably ask:

So, you like it?

Translation: Do you like like me? There’s a possibility here?

In a male’s mind, a date who likes the car is on the road to sex, because even BMW owners aren’t dumb enough to think she’s gonna get down right in the parking lot.

In the Vacuum of Space

Accepted norms about sex and romance often fail to stand up to dispassionate dismemberment. Sometimes I find phrases that don’t quite undo received wisdom, but smell right all on their own.

A leading researcher believes a key component of lust is distance and difficulty, the tension of not quite knowing whether this new person wants to sleep with you; living together for years blunts all of that.

What do you think?

A nugget of platinum lies in there, both a question and an answer.


Moon Phases

Tonight is the occasion of this cycle’s new moon, which actually marks the beginning of the 28-ish day cycle. The new moon fails to grab our imagination like the full moon, for the simple reason that one is the presence of lots of light, and the other is not. We’re simple like that, no?

The other approximately 28-ish day cycle is that of the female repro-system. You – if you’re a male – probably fail to give much attention to this. Our half of the species prefers to slide right over the mechanics of internal lady plumbing, a reasonable response given as how there is a) nothing we can do do change it, and b) no input at all required from us.

Two important points are worth noting for men.

1. Women’s estrogen levels vary (sometimes alarmingly) during their cycle.

2. They don’t like it (for the most part) any more than us.

So in a sense, we’re all on the same page.