Sweethearts, Not Maturehearts

Jordan and Annie

When someone’s riding high on their success, facing them with awkward truths appears mean. This is not meant to be mean, and in any case he won’t be listening. However, someone you know might be in a similar position, so here’s my advice:

Jordan. Please don’t marry Annie.

Annie, please don’t marry Jordan.

Not yet, at least.

The media are keen to hint that these two are planning marriage, but there’s no official news. That’s good. Maybe these two youngsters – and they are youngsters at age 21 – have the smarts to know that the chances of their marriage succeeding aren’t good.

Here is a good article explaining the statistics surrounding marriages undertaken by folks under age 25.

Until a male (especially) is at least 25, his brain is still developing. That’s point one. Point two is that his character is, as a result, still not complete. Point three is that the twenties should be a time for exploring life, to push boundaries, to discover for yourself where you fit. Marriage is an enterprise best suited for those who have this sense of proportion and place in the universe. And that comes only with experience.

And by the way, since when is the fact of being “high-school sweethearts” a predictor of anything good? What social enterprises of which you partook in high school do you use in adulthood? Do the choices you made then look prescient in hindsight?

No. I didn’t think so. So what makes your choice of boy- or girlfriend any different?