Let’s see now, I haven’t had a girlfriend in close to seven years. That’s a LONG TIME. Being without a special lady companion for that long is a result of having to cleaning up my own self-exploding personal mess.
Cleaning up personal messes takes time and energy. Sometimes in life one needs to focus – and I mean really narrow down one’s day-to-day being – on one or a couple of specific acts. And so it has been.
Now that doesn’t necessarily preclude you from maintaining a dating life, but it does for me. When I need to work at something as important as rescuing my life, I have no other way than to devote everything to the cause. The flip-side of such intensity is that there’s no room left for another.
Dating well requires time and energy. If there’s no surplus in the tank, you might as well not. You do yourself no favors by half-heartedly going about the business of exploring others; that’s been my attitude and of course everyone’s different.
My apprehension is that whilst I’ve been attending to other matters, I might have met someone really special and turned her away from simple inattention.
Accommodating other people requires spare mental and emotional capacity. Only you know if you have the ability.