Reveling in Not Understanding

Time spent understanding men – if you’re a woman – or women – if you’re a man – is part of being human. We are different, and difference piques our interest.

* Why is the female orgasm such an elusive (some might say slippery) catch?

* What’s with guys leaving (or sleeping) immediately after sex?

* Who the heck understands why one-night-stands so often remain one night affairs?

Although I have spent a great deal of time contemplating and writing about motives and proclivities, almost everything about women is a mystery to me. Inquiry is good, but I have learned that in some respects answers are best left un-found.

Answers are an end point. If we don’t have answers, we’ll keep coming back to the questions, and my suspicion is that nature intends it that way. In other words, sex and relationships are by design always about the road to discovery, not the destination. We need to keep coming back to each other.

So I believe that while a measure of clarity about ourselves and our partners creates a good foundation, not knowing is a part of the deal too. Loving your lack of understanding might be the best part of being with someone.

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