From here at age 52, the world is different than it was at 32 and certainly than at 22. My insight is that the world – and here I’m talking about the world of dating – actually isn’t much changed. I changed.
The distinction is important. Experience of life gave me perspective. People coming together in relationships of variable length, intimacy and depth is a process that doesn’t change much. Yes, there are shifts of emphasis and changes of fashion but the idea is always the same; there are biological imperatives and social constructs into which we fit them.
By social constructs I mean monogamous sexual relationships, especially marriage. Designed originally to provide a secure basis for raising children, it seems we like them beyond that narrow mission.
As the reproductive urge fades (or the possibility disappears) we’re left with couples creating deep links to each other and sex for fun. Without the piquancy of the possibility of pregnancy, the comfort and satisfaction of a committed relationship and the physical closeness that comes with it still motivate us.